Should Men Wear An Engagement Ring?

We've had manspreading and mansplaining, and now we've got the man-gagement.

Engagement rings have always been almost exclusively worn by women. Certainly in modern times, at least. Now, more and more men are choosing to wear rings themselves. Although the practice had been ongoing for a while, it was Ed Sheerhan's decision to wear an engagement ring which brought the subject into the mainstream media.

Why The Sudden Change?

It's difficult to know why some men are choosing to wear engagement rings. It may well be that they simply wish to demonstrate their commitment to the relationship. In Ancient Rome, an engagement ring on a woman's finger showed that she was "taken", and therefore off limits for other men. Whilst the point of the engagement ring has changed, very much for the better, the wearing of one remained a woman-only practice.

There's absolutely no reason, of course, why men shouldn't wear engagement rings. Rings are no more a feminine object in the 21st century than tattoos are masculine.

Ring sellers have had previous attempts at selling engagement rings to men, but with little success. A high profile campaign in the 1920s quickly disappeared when it proved completely ineffectual. In admittedly limited consumer polling, very few women were against the idea and surprisingly few men. What was clear from the research, though, is that most had no opinions on men's engagement ring one way or another.

Men Can Wear A Ring, But Should They?

Well, why not? It's 2018, after all. We live in an age where such things are perfectly acceptable. It's also a very romantic thing to do, we think. The current crop of men's engagement rings is also a design masterclass in understatement.

If we look at what's available, many actually look like a fancier wedding band. Silver or platinum tend to be the most popular metals, with some having small diamonds studded into them. In short, they are subtle in appearance but massive in the message they convey. That message is that the man is every bit as committed to the engagement as the woman, and that can only be a good thing.

Some designers are now starting to produce engagement ring sets, with matching rings for each person. Although this means both have to like the choices, it also means there is a nice symmetry to the whole thing.

Is It Really A Gender Thing?

It certainly is a part of it. Engagement rings were after all, for millennia, women only items. Equality may also play a part. It's actually difficult to remember a time when the view of women was as supporters to their men and little more. It's only really the last 50 or 60 years where the women's movement has made real progress.

It might just, therefore, be a case of both parties being equal in terms of social standing. It's also likely that expectations are just different now. The lines between gender roles are now so indistinct that men not wearing engagement rings no longer make any real sense. After all, we accept that a woman proposing to a man is perfectly normal, so why not a ring for each?

It was always seen as the case that women wanted marriage more than men. This attitude, thankfully, has slowly eroded away with time. Marriage is no longer a social goal, but an emotional one. The days when a woman needed to snare a man for her own progression have long gone. And yet we hang on to this slightly anachronistic attitude to engagement rings persists.

So, In Summary

If you haven't thought about a "mangagement" ring, do so. Because designers have reined in their often exuberant tendencies, the subtlety of most rings makes them perfect.

There's no good reason not to.